Eating Peppermint Bark
When Maddie, with her dog Kelly, returned home from their walk, the plumber was already waiting at the front door. They walked into the house, he to the kitchen, Maddie and Kelly to his feeding station. Then the doorbell rang. It was her next-door neighbor, Rachel, standing in the doorway. Her normally smiling eyes were now filled with tears that began to roll down flushed red cheeks. Through clenched teeth, she hissed, “Let me tell you what those SOB’s did to me now!”
They lived in phase three of a new housing community for active adults over the age of 50 where the developers were still constructing new homes. All the new homeowners, up and down every block, hated the builders with livid passion. The model homes were beautifully designed, but the homes they got were poorly constructed, leaving the new homeowners with endless issues. For example, the developers didn't wrap the exteriors of the homes which made them particularly drafty, and expensive to heat.
Maddie had never heard Rachel swear and was startled that her new neighbor even knew how to swear. Around Rachel, Maddie, who had a rather wealthy vocabulary of swear words, always spoke guardedly when she was angry about one new or ongoing issue with the builder. She didn't want to offend Rachel. When the plumber peeked around from the kitchen to see what was wrong, Maddie wrapped her arm around Rachel's shoulders and guided her to the library, with Kelly trailing their heels.
They sat on the sofa where Rachel continued, nearly screaming, "Those damn slimy bastards installed the wrong fireplace! We got an electric bill for last month for over $900.00!, over $900.00! Jim traced it to running that f'ing fireplace every evening! We thought it was romantic. He got an electrician to look at it, only to learn that the unit is new, but it's an old model, not an energy-efficient one, it can't run without that expensive heater being on. An old model!" She went on and on, while injecting more SOB’s, then a’holes, dumb a’holes, and a lot of mother-f’ers.
Normally, Maddie saw a generous-hearted Rachel, calm, polite, soft-spoken, careful in her manner and appearance. Every strand of hair knew its place and stayed there but was now poised to revolt. Perhaps, Maddie liked her for selfish reasons. Every day, after Maddie went to work, Rachel walked Kelly, who expressed his dislike for being left alone by raising his leg and urinating on the hot water tank in the utility room, a room Maddie had especially decorated just for his comfort. Her neighbor was determined to change that nasty behavior by taking him for long potty walks morning and noon, she would even spend a little time petting and talking to him. "He won't have a drop of pee left in him when I'm done," Rachel would say. Like Maddie, Rachel failed, but she tried.
The tirade slowed to a pause. Maddie saw her chance to say, "I have just the right thing for you." She took Rachel to the kitchen, introduced her to the plumber, then gave their shadow, Kelly, an extra-large milk bone. She opened the pantry door, took out a red and white tin, and pulled out a sheet of peppermint bark. Just breaking it apart made them salivate. On top of the thin first layer of dark chocolate was another thin layer of white chocolate, on top of that were scattered small broken pieces of red and white peppermint candy. A strong chocolate minty aroma filled their nostrils. They stood around a butcher block island crunching on peppermint bark. Their eyes would meet, they smiled and smiled, giving out soft sighs of "Mmms," and spoke in near whispers that turned into loud laughter. That's what peppermint bark can do for you.
(636 words)
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